Every Rose Has Its Thorn

So here’s the thing: the thought of long stem red roses, baby’s breath, and a decadent, ornate vase literally makes me want to throw up in my mouth.  I would rather be the recipient of a sole, dead dandelion (and at least then, I could make a wish).

I will never forget circa 2006 when my girlfriend and I were living in San Francisco and her then boyfriend sent her a bouquet of red roses from Walmart.com for Valentine’s Day.  Their relationship ended shortly thereafter (obviously).

Since then, I’ve been steering clear of roses altogether, but a few weeks ago I was enjoying coffee in our garden and the scent of our fresh, fragrant roses took me back to a time when I didn’t have such disdain for this innocent, beautiful flower.  After all, it’s not the poor rose’s fault Hallmark exploited it.

So I decided to give them a go, and I’ve since concluded that they are perfectly lovely (and indeed classy) when cut short.

You’ll start with a bouquet from Ralph’s or some other god-awful chain (and hopefully you won’t pay more than $9.99 for a dozen).

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Start by pulling apart the roses and one by one, picking off the leaves and clipping the stem.

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Make sure the bottom of the rose hits the top of the vase.

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Keep going, one by one placing them in the vase.

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Eventually you’ll end up with a pile of leaves and thorns.

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And a beautiful, small bouquet that looks something like this.

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So sweet it kind of makes my heart hurt.

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NBD.